Different Ways of Relating to Your Biases

We all have our biases, and I have a whole bunch. I have almost fifty official and there are loads of other groups where I have biases as well. But one bias does not equal another and the ways we, or at least I, relate to our biases differs from bias to bias. But I’ve been able to identify six distinctly different ways of relating that I think I could probably place every single one of my biases in. So that’s what I’ll try to do here. I’ll explain the six different stages of biasdom and exemplify what I mean by using examples from my own biases.

Stage 1 – The Sibling

This is probably a bias that you haven’t had for very long or that belongs to a group that you don’t spend a whole lot of time following. It’s a bias that you feel more protective of than thirsty for, as it should be with siblings. They might be older than you, but you might still see them as a baby that must be protected. You absolutely adore them, but even if you had the chance to hook up with them it might very well feel too awkward to go through with, simple because of how you perceive them. The chance of them being a maknae is probably large. 

Example: VIXX’s Hyuk is definitely a sibling bias to me. While I’ve had him as a bias for quite some time, he’s not normally the one I thirst for whenever I follow VIXX. I adore him, and he’s grown into a very attractive young man, but he’s more of a younger brother to me than anything else.

Other Examples: Boyfriend’s Jeongmin, Girl’s Day’s Hyeri and Red Velvet’s Irene.

Side note: I also relate to WINNER’s Seungyoon in a quite brotherly fashion, but while the other people in this stage are my younger siblings, Seungyoon is the big brother I never had. I know he’ll hold my hand and guide me right.

It’s fully possible to “cheat” on a sibling bias with another of their members, one that you may find a bit more thirst-worthy. In my case I’ve definitely cheated on Hyuk with Leo, and even Hongbin lately. And my affair with Mino is lengthy. And I even had a small side-fling with Taehyun for a while. I know my big bro will forgive me.

Stage 2 – The One You Worship

This is the bias that you absolutely love. They’re everything you want to be and you’re constantly amazed at their amazingness. You don’t really feel worthy of thirsting after them. Would you think nasty thoughts about a deity? No, you would not. This is that very same thing. They’re amazingly talented and amazing, but you just aren’t worthy of even their music video presence. This is a quite distant kind of biasing someone and might imply that you don’t know that person very well, but that is not necessarily the case.

Example: JYJ’s Jaejoong is a classic case of this for me. I’m constantly amazed by him, especially by his face, and I sometimes literally can’t look at him because he’s so radiant. I am not worthy and must avert my eyes.

Other Examples: 2AM’s Changmin, B.A.P’s Daehyun, 2NE1’s CL, Brown Eyed Girls’ Gain, Wonder Girls’ Yeeun, Kara’s Seungyeon, EXID’s LE and Spica’s Bohyung.

You do not cheat on your deity, you just don’t. They are the light of their group and while you like and acknowledge the other members too, of course, no one can ever compare.

Stage 3 – The Best Friend

This is someone you adore and may be a bias that you’ve had for a long time or that you feel like you know very well. They’re probably amazing and graceful and the light of your life, but you have no romantic interest in them. You love them and support them no matter what, but you get your sugar elsewhere. Maybe even from another member of their group.

Example: The two strongest examples of this that I can think of are two of my absolute most beloved biases out there: Girls’ Generation’s Tiffany and f(x)’s Amber. Two amazing chicks who I love and adore, no doubt. When I heard that Tiffany was dating I felt the exact same thing that I do when one of my real-life friends start dating: “Fucking awesome! You go girl! And if they hurt you, I’ll kill them.”

Other Examples: Sistar’s Bora, U-Kiss’ Kevin, B1A4’s CNU and FTISLAND’s Jonghun.

It’s perfectly possible to cheat on a best friend bias, of course. I mean, you can’t date your friend anyway, that would just be awkward. Of course you don’t have to, if none of their group members feel right, but don’t feel bad if it happens. Kevin is fully supportive of my relationship with Eli, CNU understands that Jinyoung’s face is too beautiful to ignore and Amber just looooves that me and Krystal have hit it off so well.

Stage 4 – The Old Marriage

This is a bias that you’ve had forever, and that you’ll never let go. Or at least it feels like you’ve had them forever. It’s obvious and clear that it will be the two of you in the end, but the passion is just not quite there. Maybe it sparks up now and again, but it’s not that true burning flame that was (or maybe wasn’t) there once.

Example: The most perfect example for this category is Big Bang’s T.O.P. He’s most certainly my bias, always has been and always will be. But the fire that was once between us has slowed down and is now more of a hot pile of coal. Not to say that I don’t love him, I do. I always will.

Other Examples: Apink’s Eunji, Block B’s P.O, CNBLUE’s Jungshin, Teen Top’s Niel, NU’EST’s JR, GOT7’s Mark and 2PM’s Taecyeon

While you may not feel so bad about cheating on your sibling bias or your best friend bias, you will feel really bad when you cheat on this one. And you very well might. That fire that you and your bias once had, you might find again. With another one of their members. It might just be a fling the length of a music video, or it might be a shameful affair that goes on for way too long. Among these biases I’d say I feel the most bad about cheating on Jungshin with especially Yonghwa and cheating on Mark with Jackson. I promise it meant nothing! And no matter for how short a time I glance at G-Dragon’s gorgeous face, I just know that I hurt T.O.P in a way I never intended. I swear, I will always love you, you crazy chair-obsessed man child.

Stage 5 – The New Love

This is an intense stage, the most intense one to be honest. This is that feeling of rush when you’ve met the person of your dreams and everything is just right. The sun shines out of their ass and they can do no wrong. This might be a new bias, someone you recently found and fell in love with. Or it may be someone that you’ve had for a long time, but the love for them has never slowed down.

Example: EXO’s Kai. For sure. He’s been my bias for a while now, but he just gets my heart racing. I don’t care that he can’t do this and that he’s bad at that, the boy is flawless and everything he does is magic.

Other Examples: Miss A’s Fei, T-ARA’s Jiyeon, Secret’s Jieun, BTOB’s Sungjae, Infinite’s Dongwoo, B2ST’s Hyunseung, M.I.B’s Kangnam and JJCC’s Eddy.

This is not someone you cheat on, no sir. Why would you when they’re so flawless? Actually, it might very well be so that this is actually someone you cheated with, a bias list ruiner so to speak. (Jiyeon, Sungjae and Hyunseung are all bias list ruiners)

It’s important to remember that the biases positions in these different stages are in no ways stagnant. Until fairly recently I would have considered Dongwoo a stage four bias, and I cheated on him extensively with especially L but also briefly with Woohyun. But now our love is so clearly rekindled that I can’t bare to look at anyone else, therefore he is now a stage five bias.

Stage 6 – The True Love

Maybe you’ve had this bias for a long time, maybe you haven’t (you probably have). It’s a person you wouldn’t give up for the world. Maybe you’ve been through a lot together, maybe each new thing you learn about them amazes you. You can see that they have their flaws, but you don’t mind. You love them because of their flaws, but lets face it, they have more pros than cons anyway.

Example: SHINee’s Jonghyun, of course. An ultimate bias I would say is almost always on this level. You thirst for them, you want to care for them, you’re proud of them and you’re impressed by them. They might not be flawless, but to you they are.

Other Examples: 4Minute’s Hyuna, After School’s Nana, Mamamoo’s Hwasa, ex-MBLAQ’s Joon, BTS’ Rap Monster.

You could never cheat on a true love. They’re the one and you’d never jeopardize it.

It’s important to remember that being a true love bias does not necessarily mean that that person is very high on your bias list. It could mean that, but it does not have to. These different stages simply signify different ways of relating to your biases, not how much they mean to you. To understand what I’m saying go ahead and take a look at my top five female/male biases lists:

Female Biases

1. CL – Someone I worship
2. Amber – A best friend
3. Tiffany – A best friend
4. Fei – A new love
5. Hyuna – A true love

Male Biases

1. Jonghyun – A true love
2. Kai – A new love
3. T.O.P – An old marriage
4. Joon – A true love
5. Jaejoong – Someone I worship

Every stage is represented here except for the sibling stage, and I think that speaks volumes.

Did you find this at all interesting? Do you relate to your biases in similar ways or in completely different ways? Do you maybe relate to all your biases in the same way? Which category would you place your ultimate bias in?